A Diary of Small Things

73 // via Samsung Instinct M800: So, we thought, in our...

Mon, 15 Mar 2010 18:50:00 -0400

73 // via Samsung Instinct M800:

So, we thought, in our naiveté, that Rosy was just getting fat. We had pulled the two new guinea pigs, Rosie and Mousey, out of their cages for cuddles.

These were our replacements for Oreo, who had died suddenly and without explanation — the way he had lived most of his life.

“Rosie’s got a fat butt,” my son said, emphasizing the “butt.”

My daughter giggled. “Rosie’s got a fat butt,” she chimed in.

Poor Rosie had, indeed, a fat butt. As politically incorrect as it seemed to say that, it bore the ring of truth. She looked a bit like a furry lollipop. Thin head, thin chest, then POW! All junk in the trunk. Just an eater, I guessed, and left it at that.

The next day I had come home from work and my wife asked me to feed the pigs.

Something small, hairy and very, very fast shot across the cage. Then another. Then another. Rosie came out too, looking thinner.

She’d had babies.

I should assert here that the gestation time for baby guinea pigs is 63 days. That put conception around the time we bought Rosie (the SLUT!) and Mousey.

So, after three weeks, which is about the time it takes guinea pigs to mature, I hoisted Rosie, her babies, and Mousey off to the vets to be sexed. We’d already made the decision to keep the baby cavies.

My wife and I had a friendly bet. I had money on Mousey being a boy. She thought Rosie (HARLOT!) had … aherm … done the deed before we got the animals home.

So, here’s a shot before the defining moment, with Mousey sequestered, just in case.

We now have two boys (resident in my son’s room) and three girls (in my daughter’s room).

By the way, I lost the bet.

72 // via Nikon Coolpix L12: First tooth “When I was a child, I...

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 19:01:43 -0500

72 // via Nikon Coolpix L12: First tooth

“When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.” Corinthians 13:11

I held her when she had gums, and I held her when she was teething. And I held her Monday when she showed me that she’d lost one of those teeth for the first time.

I didn’t think I’d get so emotional about it. Oh, I don’t mean crying and gushing and all that. That’s just not me. Stoic British genes.

But I’ve gotten a little nostalgic at every milestone for her and my son. The first smile, the first step, the first haircut.

I should be clear, though — all these events are about their rite of passage, for sure, not about me. That’s as it should be.

I’ll never let on about the slight halo of sadness. Each mile is a mile closer to the time when she won’t need me, or at least, not not in the way she does now.

There will be the first time she drives the car without me. There will be a time when she graduates, and moves away. And there will be a time when I say goodbye with finality.

And in part, that’s what these milestones are moving me toward, and why I must keep the sadness of them to myself, while holding the joy closer. And it is why I am so happy about the loss of her first tooth.

This is what I am meant to do. This is the role of a father.

“For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.” Corinthians 13:12

72 // via Nikon Coolpix L12: Signs on the doors Oh gosh,...

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 18:41:00 -0500

72 // via Nikon Coolpix L12: Signs on the doors

Oh gosh, another struggling headline.

My daughter has reached that wonderful age that I remember so well — a desire to put keep out signs on her door.

It’s pretty cool. I think I was 8 or 9 before I made my first “Keep Out” notice, which had a sliding paper panel designating me “in” or “out,” depending on my mood. (Not that my parents had any intention of heeding it. So much for our primal instinct to mark territory.)

Alex’s is directed at her 3-year-old brother. Next to a self portrait, it says, “No Liam. Ulle rockstars.” (No Liam. Only rockstars.)

71 // via Nikon Coolpix L12: Signs on the cars I know, I know....

Mon, 08 Mar 2010 18:41:10 -0500

71 // via Nikon Coolpix L12: Signs on the cars

I know, I know. That headline was a stretch. I was going for a play on “Signs in the stars,” which isn’t even really relevant.

Anyway, moving on.

My daughter has taken to drawing little love hearts on my car in the noxious chemical waste left over from the most recent snowstorm.

Because of that, I had to tell her to stop doing it. (I am, deep down, a sort of responsible parent.)

But it was dreadfully cute, especially when she told me she was doing it because she wanted to show me she loved me.

It may be the one, the only thing I enjoyed about that snow.

70 // via Samsung Instinct M800: Kisses When it’s cold the kids...

Mon, 01 Mar 2010 19:18:45 -0500

70 // via Samsung Instinct M800: Kisses

When it’s cold the kids and I wait in the car, and such it was a few weeks ago before the blizzard. That’s when they started attacking me in a pretty unique way. The video, commissioned by my daughter, tells the story.

69 // via Strange Neural Pathways: More Poetry

Wed, 24 Feb 2010 22:33:00 -0500

Part of being a journalist is the realization that you will never truly have another holiday off...

68 // via Nikon Coolpix L12: Weatherman I’m so very...

Fri, 12 Feb 2010 22:05:24 -0500

68 // via Nikon Coolpix L12: Weatherman

I’m so very tired. But in a good way. Wednesday night, me and a few others were snowed into where I work, The Frederick News-Post. This required sleeping on the floor, but hey, we’re a newspaper, and if we’re not going to bring you news, who will?

Anyhow, once a bulk of work was done, I went out to get my bag. The wind and blizzard were astounding. I grabbed a camera and headed back to do an impromptu bit of in-the-heart-of-the-storm reporting. You can’t hear most of what I say (like the bits about the plowing and my car), but a picture is worth a thousand words, as they say.

You can find some pictures from the night posted by me to Flickr here.

67 // via Samsung Instinct M800: Radio Gaga I confess. I am a...

Mon, 08 Feb 2010 19:21:05 -0500

67 // via Samsung Instinct M800: Radio Gaga

I confess. I am a fan of the radio. Not the whining, all-you-can-repeat music radio that’s homogenized the airwaves. Erg. No thanks.

I mean National Public Radio radio. Well, at least, I listen to that when I’m in the car because it’ll tide me over ‘til I can get home and listen to the real heavy stuff.

Oh yeah, that’s what I’m talking about. My favorite, absolute favorite thing to do is to listen via the Interwebs to BBC Radio 4.

Radio 4 sprawls across topics like an aging society dame on an Ottoman and the discussions inevitably fall on the intellectually weighty side. (For example, a rousing discussion of the morals behind one of the week’s big issues, or on the development of the lesbian novel.)

I like listening to the programs (programmes?) if only to feel bright for a while, even though I know I don’t get half of what’s being talked about.

66 // via Strange Neural Pathways: Bucketlist

Fri, 05 Feb 2010 23:11:00 -0500

I recently confessed on local radio (WFMD) during a discussion about New Year’s resolutions...

65 // via Samsung Instinct M800: Inside leg I’ve realized...

Mon, 23 Nov 2009 12:08:00 -0500

65 // via Samsung Instinct M800: Inside leg

I’ve realized what’s better than shopping for new pants when you’ve lost weight. It’s finding old ones that you threw out three or four months ago because you’d given up on ever wearing them again, because you’d given up on losing that couple of extra inches, because you’d given up on yourself.

Sorry Goodwill. I’m keeping these.

64 // via screengrab: Early delivery I love ordering things...

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 15:57:43 -0500

64 // via screengrab: Early delivery

I love ordering things online. There’s something about the anticipation of getting a parcel in the mail, then getting it. And with online tracking, it’s even more fun.

I recently bought an overcoat from Target. The estimated delivery time was next week. So, I logged in today to see which exotic part of the country it was flying through next.

Turns out it’s probably sitting on my doorstep. And just in time for the really cold weather. Sweet.

63 // via Flip UltraHD, Samsung Instinct M800: The Flip...

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 10:49:43 -0500

63 // via Flip UltraHD, Samsung Instinct M800: The Flip Off

This one speaks for itself.

62 // via http://mk2weddings.blogspot.com: Genius I’ve...

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 19:43:49 -0500

62 // via http://mk2weddings.blogspot.com: Genius

I’ve had two epiphanies in my life this year: One was during a white chocolate ganache dessert at Volt, a restaurant hear in Frederick. The other was this morning while looking at photos by Mary Kate McKenna, a local photographer.

These moments are hard to describe, being a sort of emotional reaction. How shall I couch this? I’m a cynic, a realist pretty much convinced that if we can’t experience something in some way, it doesn’t really exist.

I thought food, for example, is just nature’s way of maintaining our bodies. There is nothing special or extra-sensory about it. You eat. You go. That’s all. Then I ate at Volt. The food was good, sure. Bryan Voltaggio’s proved he’s a world-class chef from his time on Top Chef.

Then I ate dessert. I was no longer there, in the conversation. I wasn’t present in the restaurant. It was just me, this taste and … well, I guess I entered a state of what Zen masters call “no mind.”

Now, that’s genius. The epiphnay was understanding, experiencing, what all these obnoxious food critics go on about. (If you’ve ever seen “Ratatouille,” you’ll remember the scene where the food critic is instantaneously transported back to his childhood by a single taste of ratatouille). Food, I believed, couldn’t possibly do that.

I believed the same thing of pictures. What can a static image teach us about ourselves?

Looking at the photographs taken by Mary Kate, I experienced something profoundly different, but every bit as much a moment of enlightenment. Mary Kate and my family spent about an hour on Carroll Creek for a photo session that I wanted to give my wife for her birthday.

Mary Kate sent through a link to the photos today. Here’s the thing, they are awesome. Philosophers, mainly of the Continental school, have this concept called authenticity. It’s kind of a subjective term, but it’s to do with capturing the truth of something, and in doing so, making it subjectively genuine.

The photographs I saw had that authenticity. The pictures of my children made me see them as I always see them. That may sound common or garden, but in reality it is not. Pictures don’t capture the truth of what we see everyday. They are, supposedly, a moment in time, divorced from all the preceding and antecedent moments. But these still moments of my children held in them the absolute and authentic timeless essence of my kids.

That is to say, they captured something eternal. In 20 years, in 50 years, I will be able to look back on these photographs and say with absolute certainty, “This is my son and this is my daughter, and this is how they were in this moment, and countless other moments like them. this is them in a moment of truth.”

It takes a true artist to be able to give the experience of authenticity. It takes a true artist to provide us with a transcendence that allows us to touch on a thing greater than ourselves, something immutable and eternal.

61 // via Nikon Coolpix L12: The Icing on the Cake For the...

Sun, 28 Jun 2009 22:19:44 -0400

61 // via Nikon Coolpix L12: The Icing on the Cake

For the first time ever, I iced a cake. Two, in fact, one for my son’s birthday, one for my daughter’s. Mickey Mouse, and some sort of Cars scene. It was frustrating, but fun, and the cakes turned out to be more icing than sponge.

A cake’s progress:

59 // via Free Clip Art Junction: Happy Birthday, Bug! My son...

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 16:35:15 -0400

59 // via Free Clip Art Junction: Happy Birthday, Bug!

My son is 3 years old today and lights me up. Nuff said.

60 // via drawing and Samsung Instinct M800: Out of the...

Fri, 19 Jun 2009 16:28:00 -0400

60 // via drawing and Samsung Instinct M800: Out of the Box

Here’s to dreaming a big dream. I’ve had an idea, and who knows if it’s going to work out. Maybe it won’t. Maybe I’ll never get to the point where it’s anything but words on paper.

But I’m crazy passionate about it. I can’t say what it is right now, obviously. I don’t want to give it the kiss of death.

But at least I want to throw a nod its way, let it know that I haven’t forgotten it, that incrementally I’m building toward it. The foundations are dug. Soon, the bricks will go in.

Here’s to dreaming a big dream. Here’s to those crazy dreamers who dream them.

58 // via Fuji FinePix F480: Handbags in waiting Alligators....

Wed, 17 Jun 2009 17:11:13 -0400

58 // via Fuji FinePix F480: Handbags in waiting

Alligators. Vicious bastards, alligators. And that’s why they’re cool.

If you want to see ‘em up close and personal in the wild, although at a convenient more-than-arm’s-length, there’s a spot along the famous Alligator Alley that runs east to west connecting Miami to Naples.

We took the kids there, first time for my son, second time for my daughter (she was really too young to appreciate it the first time).

It’s a short boardwalk, maybe 70 yards long, that sits above a long canal next to a gravel road. (People actually live along it, amazingly enough.)

Alligators just gather there and slumber right alongside turtles and other wildlife. Tons of them, lurking in the brackish green water. With teeth. Big teeth.

Here’s a map. If you’re ever in south Florida, you can go see for yourself. It’s about halfway across.

View Alligators on view in a larger map

57 // via screengrab: I am @cgcumber Twitter is like my new...

Tue, 16 Jun 2009 18:39:36 -0400

57 // via screengrab: I am @cgcumber

Twitter is like my new favorite thing.

Really. You may not understand it, you may question its worth — fairly enough — but Twitter users (or tweeps) are having a conversation, and you may well not know about it.

For a journalist like myself, Twitter is a way to engage in conversation with an audience. It’s also a good way to find out about cool stuff going on, or just to meet interesting people.

You can see my Twitter feed by scrolling down to the bottom of the page.

56 // via Olympus C860L: Retirement planning This is Polperro,...

Tue, 16 Jun 2009 18:36:32 -0400

56 // via Olympus C860L: Retirement planning

This is Polperro, a small, very small, Cornish fishing village in England. This photo is from 2002, my last visit. One day, I want to perhaps retire there. A quiet cottage, maybe a room. And I’d like to sit for a while, think back on my life and paint watercolors.

55 // via Olympus something or other Ah, mea culpa, to quote...

Mon, 15 Jun 2009 19:10:30 -0400

55 // via Olympus something or other

Ah, mea culpa, to quote the Latin.

It’s been far too long since I’ve posted. That’s not to say I’ve had no happy moments recently, only that I haven’t had time to write them up. The happy moments, I assure you, have been plentiful.

About four weeks ago they began in earnest when I went on vacation to my parent’s place in Naples, Fl. The gated community my parents live in boasts (at least it did when they bought it) the largest pool in southwest Florida.

And a pretty nice pool it is, with an island and waterfalls and cabanas and palm trees. And this trip was filled with so much: alligators; staring contests; beard growth; quiet evenings on the lanai.

So, here it is: today’s happy shit (to use my friend Sarah’s title for this blog): vacation. Ah, let me slumber restful ‘neath a shady tree.